Seriously, my heart is
teary right now as I write this article. It is 9:10am (Monday, 06/05/2013) and
I suddenly feel so sad about something that has been on my mind for a while
now. I am reading a book entitled; ‘The
Relief from Distress, an Explanation to the Du’a of Yunus,’ by Ibn
Taymiyyah and I have reached a point where we are given examples of prayers by
the Prophets, who admit their weakness before asking Allah for forgiveness.
I am thinking, even
Prophets, who are known to be righteous were trying so hard to establish a most
beautiful relationship with Allah.
Something happens that
makes me pause my reading. So much sorrow in my heart that I thought I should
share my thoughts in the best way I can; ‘Writing.’ Probably, someone would
read and benefit and I would be glad.
We are told by the Prophet
Muhammad (peace be upon him) in various ahaadith that when you have a daughter,
she could be your source of Jannah. Among these are;
'Uqba
ibn 'Amir reported that he heard the Messenger of Allah, may Allah bless him
and grant him peace, say, "If someone has three daughters and is patient
with them and clothes them from his wealth, they will be a shield against the
Fire for him."
‘Ibn
'Abbas reported that he heard the Messenger of Allah, may Allah bless him and
grant him peace, say, "There is no Muslim who has two daughters and takes
good care of them but that he will enter the Garden."
Subhaanal Laah! Just read
that! What a blessing the girl child could be for parents. But do some parents
really understand this? I guess they don’t understand that at all. If your
daughter could shield you from the Hellfire, then that should tell you that you
cannot just give birth to her and ignore her and expect her to be that ‘daughter
who shields you from fire.’ No, you shouldn’t.
Aren’t most of our
daughters turned to the ‘Slavery of begging?’ When fathers
and mothers have refused to take up their responsibilities towards their
daughters. They do not care what they wear or how they get what they wear, what
they eat, how they get their money, the work they do, and all others.
This reminds me of one key
thing about my mum, the moment she sees me with anything that she didn’t buy or
any family buy, then she would have to find out where I got it. So, the moment
I have something, I have to explain to her how I got it until now that I am
matured and very trusted by her not to enslave myself to men and others. It is
quiet recently that I bought my own phone which I am very proud of and she also
knows that I am able to buy it. But even with that she still asked me. And
recently, I sewed a dress for myself, she saw me in it and asked me about it.
Is this not what most of our parents are lacking?
Indeed, we are fast to
blame our daughters for their easy ways but sometimes, it is our own doing. It
is especially sad where the guardians are able to afford a good life for their
daughters yet they neglect them to themselves in these times when most men have
turned into wolves waiting to devour girls with some dispensable presents, the
popular one of which is a phone. Subhaanal Laah! Subhaanal Laah! Subhaanal
Laah! Do ponder dear reader! Please ponder!
It saddens me so much and
I wish I had a way of stopping this. But how can I? I can only appeal to
whoever is reading this article to not just read for reading sake but to really
think and reflect and take heed. We have sisters and we sometimes watch them
cater for their lives without knowing their source of finance. It is even more
painful that some of the guardians tend to accept presents from such daughters
and they are proud that they are able to cater for themselves. Subhaanal Laah!
What ignorance!
It is indeed very pathetic
to witness a girl who prays that someone might give her something so that she
could take care of her something when her parents are alive and kicking and
have the means to give her that something to take care of her something. Yaa
Allah! It is really painful. Why would you as a parent wake up in the morning,
eat and leave your daughter to be thinking of what to eat for the day and then
she begins to expect calls from the men so that they could get her some money
to cater for herself. Subhaanal Laah! Subhaanal Laah!
May be I am lucky to belong
to a family that understands that I am their responsibility and they must
provide my needs before I even dare think of alternatives, so I could say all
these. May be I am lucky to belong to parents who understand that for me to be
a source of Jannah for them, then they need to invest in me enough for that to
happen bi iznil Laah (by the permission of Allah). But shouldn’t all Muslims
who believe in Allah give their daughters this privilege as well if they can?
And if they can’t, aren’t there better ways of struggling for survival for
themselves and their daughters rather than watching these precious daughters
enslave themselves to this social canker?
And it is funny how we do
not see how disastrous this issue is to our Islam. No matter whom a woman is,
whether ugly or beautiful, rich or poor, there are men who will come after her
for various reasons except in rare cases. Some of these men are mostly in to
destroy her and leave her in that destruction. Should the guardians not
therefore do all they can to protect their daughters from such an unfortunate
situation?
Even emotional help for
our daughters is lacking. Parents do not let their daughters feel their love at
all. The father and daughter are like a cat and a mouse. How could they confide
in them with their troubles? Mothers cannot sacrifice for the well-being of
their daughters anymore and sometimes, they even plunged their daughters
further into this evil. They have caused their daughters to treat them in such
a disrespectful manner and it only reminds us of one of the signs of the Day of
Regrets told to us by the noble Prophet;
‘The slave girl will give
birth to her master.’
And
doesn’t a father or a mother find joy in seeing his or her daughter trek a path
towards righteousness rather than this shameful path? Alhamdu lil Laah for my
family; my mother especially. She is a terrific mum. May Allah make Jannatul
Firdaus her final abode. And this is a woman who had no secular education. She
called me ‘Masoo iya’ ‘My love,’ ‘Abuya’ ‘My friend’ and other affectionate
names and she doesn’t just say it, she makes me feel it and when I am about to
do something that is not right, she lets me know. That is not to say that she
is not stern; she could be the sternest when she has to be.
And
my father, may Allah shower an abundance of His Mercy on his soul, was indeed a
bosom friend that I miss so much. He makes me feel his love so much that I
cannot simply forget him. Alhamdu lil Laah for him.
Now,
I give examples of my family to make a point. We can all be the excellent kind
of parents who strive to see that their daughters are provided for and content
with life so that they could trek the right path that will lead them to Jannah.
But of course, to every rule there is an exception. Some of our daughters could
be our test in this life because for whatever we do, they will still enslave
themselves to men but let us try hard and harder to be best to our daughters
and family as we are told by the Prophet Muhammad (saw) that;
‘The
best of you are those who are best to their families and I am the best of you.’
Allah
says in Surah At-Tahreem (the Prohibition), Chapter 66:6 that;
‘O
you believe! Save yourselves and your families from a Fire whose fuel is men
and stones…’
Preventing our daughters
from this kind of slavery is to me some sort of salvation for our daughters.
Subhaanal Laah! Imagine, a girl trying all she can to get a man to buy her a
phone or some food items or pay her fees or take her places, or buy her a dress
and others like that when her parents can afford that a thousand fold yet how
dare her request that from them because they don’t care and they have made her
understand that she must fend for herself as a source of financial relieve for
them… Subhaanal Laah! When Allah stopped us from the ignorance of killing our
daughters, do we think that we do those daughters any good by letting them live
only to grow up into such a mess? Ponder! Really, ponder!
Think & Reflect and
never ever let your daughters or sisters or anyone go through this whiles you
can.
May Allah reward you with
goodness for reading this. May Allah give you the ability to implement this,
ameen thumma ameen.
And
Oh! Is that not one of the causes of ‘Cohabitation?’
Jazaakumul Laahu khairan
brother and sister!
By Rubaba Mmahajia Rahma Sabtiu
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